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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

It's Cute

Hye.

i've never thought people would read this. haha. just. that even if you are reading this i just hope you would just keep it as a secret. i mean to yourself. dont tell me that. cause then..i would feel mcm ohmygosh malu?

well..i've chatted with this someone i had a crush 2 years ago but then he had a girlfriend, and stuff. guess what's my wish this year? is to fall in love!:D yeah. im recovering from a really bad breakup, which..actually with a guy who i didn't even had a relationship with (?) ! i know i know it's a mess. but at least that's over. i feel more free and happy. it's not that he's all bad just that, we both kept this weird 'grudges' kott and constantly x puas hati dgn each other.

well, im afraid to trust cause i got rejected a couple of times already. guys i like seems to toy with me and it sucks.

so now.. yup i really wanna to have somebody but then again..i dont think my hearts ready for that kind of pain again. and again and again. supposedly it should be numb now.

well love to me is still and very good thing very pure and should be something share.(:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC9rJZKUAPg

*i dont know how to post video! *please teach me haha

.:LoveIsBaeutiful:.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Tak kesah laa..

seriously after she said 'whats up with youu? you seem all happy and stuff even i can feel the vibe. me likey!:)" i feel like crap.

cause u know why?

cause yes, it is crappy right now. and it seems that im faking it sooo good that i freak myself out. i hate everything still. call me pessimist i am one. i can't seem to forget what i have done and what other people had done toward me. it's not vengeful it's just..hard to forget. *orang kata makan la semut banyak"*

i still can't forget and it bothers me alot. in my dreams, my life, and you? well you. you hide your wall to me? wow you never fail to disappoint me you know, congratulations! (: you were never there when i need you, *okay maybe just once when i cried about boys and you were there watching me do so* . you hurt my feelings a lot but i care for you most.

i didnt even mind when you start hanging out with other people without me cause i was always i was always out with that loser anyway. it didn't matter that i didn't click in with your friends right away but i still love you as always.

but when these things pile up, etc: you never listen to me, you always think you're right, you're not there for me, you hides things from me. it kinda makes me feel what i feel about you isn't what you feel about me. and it's not cool, cause i feel like a 'infiltration' to you're life. and guess what, i rather be not. so i'm just going away.. you know, from you. of course you wouldn't even care cause you never did anyway.

i know i sound like such a sore loser, but my trust has been abuse way too much *not just by you but by whatitseemslike all other people also* that i feel i was left naked. alone. humiliated.

Goodbye. :')

.:Life@21:.

Monday, January 16, 2012

iT's Been Ages.

hi again!

someone once close to me remind me of my blog. i thought i'd burried it away since..i dont know, its not fun?:| but when i read back my past entries..hey, i miss this. i kind of forgotten of who i was before, and how i got to come becoming who i am today.

sure it's not much. i didn't even reach 10 post.lol. but..yep. i kinda miss this. annd.. thanks to the guy who reminds me of all this:)

we're still close. haha. *for me i take it as that way.

well life is being a b*tch. haha. everything sort of reminds me of something that either it is not cool and downright south sucks. and literally everything. and im in process of 'cleansing' myself (?) *whatever that is* and yeah, i want to be all neutral again. im just saying its tough right now. :) haha

well meet my kitten!
Isn't she cute! just adorable. i llovvveee her soo much! <3 :D Her name's Maybeline. we call her Maybel. it's maybeline cause she looks like she's wearing white eyeliners.haha *no point. omaigos merepek -_-

well, goodnight world. be nicer to me next morning maybe?:3

.:MissLoveALotIGuess:.